An envisioning . . . .villa up the coast from Helsinki in a 1952 winter with dusk closing in.

Oh to be here.

Tea and a blazing fire with the maid about to open a box of cookies back in the kitchen. Well, only three boxes left but more to come as soon as a grandchild comes to visit from England. An entire second suitcase filled each time and that enough to last until Christmas or maybe next June depending on how many young people there are to help eat them up.

Helsinki more fun what with its theatres and all but a husband lost and a need to economize. Funny. Lived through all that excitement in Saint Petersburg and sneakings out after that man made the tsar die, only to have a spasm and collapse eating mushrooms that turned out to be the poison kind and not the sort to fry up in a little frying pan with sherry.

But the quiet nice, too. So many years with babies to take care of and not enough time to sit and read let alone sit and think. . . .a long way back  .. . only time to think and not have to take care of anybody . . . an album tucked away and a memory in flood . . . science class and everyone with a long braid down their backs instead of grown up lady things. . . .  time and all the energy in the world . . . .the energy gone but all the time in the world to remember from before it all got gone.

A physics lesson at the Smolny Institute, Saint Petersburg.
A physics lesson at the Smolny Institute, Saint Petersburg. From an 1905 album. Taken from “A Smolny Album: Glimpses into Life at the Imperial Educational Society of Noble Maidens,” edited by Nancy Kovaleff Baker and published in 2018. Image © 2019 Academic Studies Press. Fair use license. via






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